Confessions of a Claustrophobic Fighter Pilot
Courage isn't fearlessness - it's flying with fear and still rising.
Oct 24, 2025
Courage isn't fearlessness - it's flying with fear and still rising.
Your mission must always rise higher than your fear - embrace the flight.
If there’s one thing I faced every time I strapped into an F-16 in combat, it was fear.
Fear of getting shot down. Fear of becoming a prisoner of war. Fear of letting down my team.
These weren’t just basic emotions. They were obstacles to my performance.
But the biggest one wasn’t a missile being launched at my aircraft. It was the missile launched in my mind.
Three years into my flying career, I almost died in a scuba diving accident. Thirty-five feet underwater, my mask malfunctioned, and I inhaled a lungful of salt water. I’ll never forget choking and gasping for air. I had a massive panic attack – the first of my life.
The result? I developed PTSD. I started struggling with claustrophobic panic attacks when I flew at night or in bad weather. Panic attacks are terrifying. But for a fighter pilot? It’s a big deal!
So - for the next eight years, every time I flew, I asked myself, “Is today the day I lose it?” That claustrophobia missile became my invisible enemy, waiting to launch. I never knew when it would show up.
While it ultimately never impacted my ability to do my job safely and successfully, it robbed me of the joy I once had for flying.
But I didn’t quit. I stayed in the cockpit and confronted my fear. And over time, the fear lost its hold on me. I didn’t just survive – I built resilience. I completed 65 combat missions, earned my wings, and lived my dream.
But it wasn’t easy.
We all know fear Is inevitable – but so is growth – if you know how to handle your fears!
Obstacles are part of life. Layoffs. Divorce. Debt. Cancer. COVID. The loss of a loved one… or the loss of a massive sale you were counting on.
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These are all missiles. They’re headwinds to performance. But they’re really just challenges. And when you commit to facing them, something powerful happens.
You stop surviving and start winning. Your focus and mindset shift. You build courage and grit. You break the fear barrier.
Over the years, as I’ve coached leaders, entrepreneurs, and top-performing teams, I’ve discovered five tactics that helped me break through fear and uncertainty. I believe they can help you too!
1. Stop Being Fearless
Being fearless sounds great on a T-shirt or as a title of a book – but it’s unrealistic. It puts rose-colored glasses around real adversity. The more I tried to resist my claustrophobia, the more it paralyzed me. Because as they say, what resists… persists.
When we acknowledge fear, we can work with it. It humbles us and makes us more empathetic and self-aware. It humanizes us.
You don’t need to be a superhero. You’re not invincible. You’re human.
Fear and anxiety are part of life. But when you subjugate fear to courage – when you lead with what I call a “mission-mindset,” not emotion – you start to take positive, high-energy action. And action is the impetus to change.
2. Outsmart Your Obstacles
When I first dealt with my claustrophobia, I became a student of the mind. I read everything I could on fear and anxiety. I reviewed case studies. Learned strategies. Spoke to experts.
It didn’t fix me overnight or even in a year. But it gave me a plan to tackle my fears and anxieties when they appeared. This built my confidence – and confidence is the fuel for courage.
So when the missiles come – don’t just react. Get smarter. Have a plan. Take a course. Sharpen your skills. Eliminate distractions. Clean up your health, your stress, your relationships, and your diet.
Prepare for all of your missions as if your life (or your lifestyle) depends on it – because sometimes it does.
As I say in my book Never Fly Solo, “Wingmen Never Wing it.”
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Your mission must always rise higher than your fear - embrace the flight.
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3. Nurture Your Wingmen
In combat, my fear diminished when I knew I wasn’t flying alone. When I knew I had wingmen – those I could trust with my life and who had my back. In essence, they absorbed my fear.
A true wingman doesn’t just cover your six. They build your perspective and call out your blind spots. Sometimes we can’t see what’s negatively affecting our lives, but a wingman can.
So, do your best to nurture relationships with others who not only see the best in you, but can coach you up. Be willing to have others tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. This requires vulnerability.
And when you hit a wall, and panic and uncertainty come, garner the courage to say the three hardest words in life: “I need help.”
You can’t fly solo through fear. And you don’t have to.
4. Focus on the Mission
Fear clouds your vision. It puts you in survival mode and makes you forget what you’re fighting for. That’s why mission clarity is so critical.
In combat, if I lost track of my objective or the target, I was toast. I had to know what the target was and why it mattered. And it’s the same in business and life.
I believe “Survivors focus on threats. Winners focus on targets.”
So, what are you focusing on? Your fears or your purpose?
I like to call it “the why before you fly.” The challenge is, when you’re in panic mode, that’s not the time to figure out what your purpose is!
Maybe it’s your spouse. Your kids. Your clients. Your future.
Whatever it is – lock onto it. Let it guide you and redirect your mindset to keep you from drifting off course.
Remember – when fear rises, your mission must rise higher.
5. Think Outside the Cockpit
Fear thrives in isolation and doesn’t like relationships.
So, when it comes, get out of your head and shift your focus to others.
Show up for someone struggling. Be a comrade of courage and lend your wings to those who need you to ground them. It will give your struggle meaning, and you’ll find that fear will lose its grip.
Service creates strength. And love repels fear.
Fear will visit all of us. The goal isn’t to eliminate it – it’s to confront it with courage.
So… what fear are you avoiding?
What uncertainty missile have you been dodging instead of facing?
And who’s your wingmen in this mission?
You’ve got the tools. You’ve got the team.
You’re cleared for takeoff.
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