Networking Rules!
Great networking starts with who you are - not who you want to meet.
Oct 25, 2025
Great networking starts with who you are - not who you want to meet.
Be the person people remember, not just the one they meet.
I was recently reading the pool rules at the public swimming pool in my development. You can probably rattle off many of the rules off the top of your head – no running, no splashing, no food or drink, no alcohol – no fun!
Can you imagine what it would be like if there were “rules” posted at every conference, convention, networking event, trade show, product show, chamber mixer, and holiday shin-dig?
Below are some Networking Rules that might demystify the concept of networking and make it easier for you to dive right in. Swim at your own risk.
Proper Attire Required
Determine ahead of time if the event requires business, casual, or very casual attire. I just moved to Florida, so I’m re-learning my attire. There’s enough on your mind, why let your appearance and fashion sense be something else to worry about? Although you might be thinking about business attire, some events may not warrant it. In fact, if your target market is a trade like construction, it may not be the right environment to wear full-on business attire.
Must Have Business Cards and a Pen (or Two)
It amazes me how many professionals I meet at business functions don’t have a business card with them. (Yes, even with smartphones.) Business cards breed business and seasoned pros know that. Or they should. Even if you’re attending a conference with others who do what you do, it always pays to have a business card with you. You don’t want to look unprepared or uninterested in meeting others. My target market is financial services – why wouldn’t a financial advisor have a business card? And an advisor without a pen? C’mon!
Do Your Homework and Know Who Will Be There
Do you know who rounds out the guest list? Have you determined ahead of time who will be in attendance? It’s difficult to connect (or reconnect) with those you need to if you’re unsure who will be attending. You can simply visit the webpage for the event or organization or ask a coordinator if you can have access to the list as a registrant.
No Selling Allowed
Networking and selling are two completely different swim strokes. Use a networking event to meet and greet others, make a good connection, learn, compare notes, and potentially offer help. If the connection is helpful to one of you or best – both of you, prepare for a follow-up if appropriate. Otherwise, expect a loud whistle to be blown and to be escorted off the premises by the lifeguard on duty. No selling ever! Those you meet at networking events are not your prospects, unless they tell you they are.
Be Prepared to Ask Questions
It’s the best way to start a conversation, learn, and attract people to you. Here are a few of my favorite questions. What project are you working on now? Who do you work for? Do you like what you do? What are some of the biggest challenges you face in your work? How long have you been in your role? What brings you to this event? What are you hoping to accomplish here? How will you know you’ve been successful? How can I help you?
If you’re genuine, naturally curious, and a little lucky, you may have similar questions asked of you too. Imagine that!
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Greet and Introduce Others with Passion
I love introducing people I know to other people I know. It helps provide an easy connection for others, I’m helping the cause, and I feel pretty good about myself. And they feel pretty good about me – which of course can’t happen enough. Besides, if I help other people in good faith, the splash I make has a way of coming back. What can be better than that?
Give a Card, Only When Asked
I have found it a great practice to hand out a business card when asked – not before. Why, you ask? You save cards because most of the time, the cards you generously circulate get tossed. But more importantly, it’s a way of qualifying why someone wants your card in the first place. You may respond with, “I’m happy to give you my card – what are you thinking?”
Again, don’t just give it out for the sake of it or because you feel you ought to. You might feel that handing out your card breaks up that uncomfortable silence that presents itself when it seems there is no longer anything to say. It seems rude to me to offer a business card to someone who didn’t ask for one. After all, if they wanted it, they would ask.
Help Others, Be a Buddy
I’m all about helping others get their feet wet and encouraging them to network. It’s a nice thing to do and a big part of making a splash at the event. It’s also a lot of fun (and sometimes safer) to network with a buddy – especially if they’re looking to meet the same type of people as you. Just don’t let the safety and comfort you may have with your buddy prevent you from meeting new people and making new connections.
Keep the Conversation Short
If possible, try not to talk to anyone longer than 6–8 minutes – without ever looking at your watch. That’s just rude. But the last thing you want is to prevent someone from moving on and meeting more people. And you probably want the chance to make a few more connections as well.
At a point when you might get that lull in the dialogue, invite the contact to continue the conversation over the next couple of weeks. This can be via Zoom or whatever. If you don’t wish to continue the conversation (and they may not want to either) simply say, “It was great speaking with you and best of luck today.” You may want to introduce them to someone else who may be a better connection for them.
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"“For networking to take, you have to give!”
– Michael Goldberg"
Be the person people remember, not just the one they meet.
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Yes, you can provide text passages
Listen More and Talk Less
Especially right after eating. When meeting someone in a networking environment, it’s easy to get caught up in what you’re going to say next rather than listening fully. Of course, professional speakers like to talk – especially about themselves. (I know, I’m a speaker!) It should be the opposite. I have found that if we listen more, we’ll learn more. And that will lead to more and better connections.
Always Follow Up
When there is a reason to do so! Not following up is the same thing as not having made the connection in the first place. Of course, if you’re speaking with someone about becoming your client, there’s probably no issue with the follow-up.
But how about when the connection you make is not with a prospect? (Almost always the case.) If there is a good reason for another discussion, say so right then. If there is agreement, the stage is set for you to send an email within 24 hours and initiate the next step.
Make a Friend and Have Fun
Once you meet a few great people, you will be much more comfortable in the deep end, and networking may become fun! If you make networking feel like work, it will be work. Just be out to learn, make friends, help people, and have fun.
Establish these rules as your standard and you’ll be a Knock-Out Networker in no time!
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